Aluminum Pole Not Included

Today's Holiday Greeting: Happy Festivus!

Grove Lake: The world premiere was a couple Saturdays ago and it was pretty well attended. I guess some 400 people showed up to see the big picture including some of my family and , friends (Thanks everybody for coming!). I was a little nervous to see myself on the screen, but squinting my eyes seemed to help. As for the film itself, I thought it was very entertaining. The acting was top shelf and it was professionally made. My friend Wanita Spence proved she has the stuff of a movie star, almost walking away with the film completely. A couple of my scenes got cut, but that's to be expected when you're playing a character not too central to the plot. I was disappointed the scene where I threw worms at an old lady ended up on the cutting room floor, but that's showbiz!

Christmas Party: Well, Touchy Feely Fotos' annual holiday get-together was fairly disappointing. The grub was actually tasty, but the gift they handed out was lame. We loyal, underpaid employees received a tote bag this year. A tote bag! I'm sorry, but that's not a quality gift, that's a public television pledge drive giveaway. As for the comedian they hired to entertain us, I vacated the premises before he got to perform. Since I never heard a peep about his performance afterwards, it's probably safe to say he sucked. However, my opinion may be clouded by my bitterness.